The Past

Jemverse is mostly two weeks ahead
or behind if you think like that instead
So what you are reading I wrote sometime back
Keep that in mind and you'll keep on track

©Jemverse

Smart

A 'Moleskine' 'Smart', quite amazing
I write with my pen in my book
then go to the App on my i-phone
to get a new digital look
On the App I can edit the written
then email it straight to my Mac
where it's ready to publish on Jemverse
keeping me ever safely on track

©Jemverse

 

Never better me

Once again the early hours
and tired, I'm wide awake
The vacant thoughts in overtime
no substance there, all fake
And yet of course enough to keep
at bay the thing I need
Sleep the healer, distant now
the thoughts - they pay no heed
So to distraction's stead I turn
and scratch my pen to paper
attempting to describe in verse 
this new alarming caper

Respite (if one can call it that)
is as I'm now retired
if slumber comes in daylight time
and vacant thoughts are fired
I can find a catnap here and there
or little doze or rest
It's not ideal but circumstance
tells me that's for the best.
A blight this illness, erudite
it grows insidiously
But it will never ever take a hold
and never better me

©Jemverse

 

Something happened

Something happened a week ago
I'd been feeling unwell and had become slow
and breathing was tricky and laboured you know
So I went to the doctor to ask

He arranged for some bloods to be taken from me
got results and referred me immediately
to hospital to check with immediacy
So I duly complied to the task

A CT scan. Endoscopy. More tests
to find out why I wasn't feeling my best
and then diagnosis to fulfil that request
To allow us to finally see

Blood clots on the lungs and an internal bleed
caused by something which had taken seed
an insidiousness which was taking no heed
Spreading and eating at me

Stage 4 cancer I'm told. End game. Curtains.
Expectancy months, not a year; that's quite certain
looks like my life has gone for a burton
Caught me off guard, naturally

That was last Wednesday. A week has now gone
Love's been outpoured by many upon
me here but I'm reeling and feeling so numb
And words don't cut how I feel

This cancer's insidious; its spreading quite fast
so one thing's for certain - I'm not going to last
much longer in life; I'll soon be the past
As there's naught that will help here to heal

But whilst I have breath I'll continue to write
and share here with feeling to bring some insight
to this something that's happened although it is shite
As I feel strongly that you need to know

Oxymoron, my future; known and unknown
a gift one might say but not one to condone
though it's something of course I now need to own
And relay here its detail apropos.

©Jemverse

Photo – Sally Croucher

Innovation writing

Gold watch a misnomer, none of that here
But I did get a pen to bring me some cheer
'Innovation' - a hybrid - it writes like a dream
a fountain/cross roller (if you get what I mean)
My choice on retirement to remember them by
an extravagance yes, but boy does this fly
a pen like no other that I've ever had
which I'll use as a writer - it won't be a fad
Proof of pudding right here as I write these lines down
with a black and gold dream to dispel any frown

©Jemverse

The pen is a Parker ‘Innovation’. It’s a hybrid cross between a fountain pen with a nib, but with a rollerball in the middle. This was my retirement gift from my employer of 40+ years – my choice.

The love of writing

It seems I can write and make people smile
Even bring a few tears every once in a while
Evidenced by when a short time ago
I had cause to recite one I'd written you know
And the things good folk said and repeated again
after I'd finished with every refrain
brought tears to my eyes, I can tell you right there
Quite lovely to hear when your heart you have shared
So as it seems I can write I will do so some more
As that's what I am and what my life is for

©Jemverse

Photo – Jempics

(revisiting) an ode to Autumn

10 of 10 in the ‘Fading 23’ series

Pale-white shrinking golden glow
hovers over water slow
and morning waking slumber stays
as it peers slowly from the haze
Whimsy holds removed I see
a world at distance wistfully
as summer fades to distant glow
and cooler days I soon will know
A curtain call as evening falls
and summer into winter calls
Yet tangible with treasure hold
the Autumn swan-song bathed in gold

©Jemverse

‘An ode to Autumn‘ was first posted in December 2019

Photo – Jempics

Season’s song (revisited)

9 of 10 in the ‘Fading 23’ series

I have a mind’s eye picture
of autumn here to find
which I’d like to share with you
and hope that you don’t mind
For though it’s one of fading
from a summer that’s now passed
it’s also one of hope
which I know is set to last

Yes the winter it is coming
and it will be long and cold
but to the autumn’s promise
throughout that I can hold
For I’ve entered an agreement
binding, absolute and strong
of a new hope come the Springtime
when I’ll sing that seasons song

©Jemverse

‘Season’s song‘ was first posted in November 2020

Photo – Jempics

It sings

At the sunset of a summer day
fronds of fading capture light
and low to ground whilst looking up
all this I favour in my sight

Analogy of life lived long
as autumn's season now begins
and with the glow of setting sun
with fading fronds my heart it sings

©Jemverse

Photo – Jempics

Went for a walk (slight return)

11 of 12 in the ‘A life worth living’ series

Went for a walk
down by the sea
Near to the waves
as they sang to me

Went for a walk
up on Sussex hill
Near to the Downs
a longing to fill

Went for a walk
along river’s bank
always a thrill
to be perfectly frank

Went for a walk
just down the road
and thought of this rhyme
there as a I strode

Went for a walk
through life as you do
This analogy right
for me through and through

©Jemverse

[Went for a walk was first posted in February 2017 but slightly revisited today]